Sunday, May 10, 2015

This Week with George Stephanopoulos – May 10, 2015


Pierre Thomas
Sec. Jeh Johnson – Homeland Security
John Miller – NYPD
Gen. Peter Chiarelli (Ret.)
Christine Brennan – USA Today
Jesse Palmer – ESPN
Gwen Ifill
Greta Van Susteren
Jamelle Bouie
Rich Lowry


Raddatz: OMG thousands of
ISIS followers are going to kill
millions of Americans!!

Thomas: the FBI is warning that
Americans in every state will be
murdered in their sleep by ISIS

Comey: ISIS has thousands
of followers on Facebook!

Pentagon: lock the doors!

Thomas: ISIS sending 90,000
twittter message per day!!

Raddatz: #panic

Thomas: they even imitate Grand Theft Auto and the hip-hop!

Cory Booker: look at their fancy memes!

Raddatz: I am completely petrified!

Johnson: we beat the Nazis you know

Raddatz: stuff it Jeh I'm frightened

Johnson: ISIS learned how
to use the Internet to kill

Raddatz: damn you Tim Berners-Lee!!

Johnson: we are warning
people to be scared

Raddatz: how many home grown
jihadists will murder American
children in their beds?

Johnson: hundreds if not thousands

Raddatz: so we are totally
unprepared for this scary threat

Johnson: true but we are now talking
to local police departments to warn
them they are about to be attacked

Raddatz: the FBI warns the ISIS
is saying KILL KILL KILL

Johnson: the third KILL is for extra killing

Raddatz: well now I'm terrified

Johnson: you should be

Raddatz: my government is failing me!

Johnson: I went to New York
to talk to muslims there

Raddatz: that's it?

Johnson: it's a work in progress Martha

Raddatz: ISIS rules social media

Johnson: they are slick

Raddatz: why can't America
get on the Internet?

Johnson: Islamic leaders frankly
can talk the language better
than bureaucrats in DC

Raddatz: how likely am I to
be killed this weekend?

Johnson: don't buy any big containers of milk

Raddatz: John I'm absolutely
scared out of my mind

Miller: it's scary world Martha

Raddatz: are we doing
enough to stop terrorists?

Miller: I know muslims are worried
about surveillance but frankly
they are not speaking out
against terrorism enough

Raddatz: tough words

Miller: anti-ISIS rhetoric can't
come from the government

Raddatz: it can't?

Miller: ISIS has Apple computers and
those iWatches like all the kids today!

Raddatz: how we can stop
us all from being killed?

Chiarelli: stop terrorists from entering
military bases without permission

Raddatz: is everyone on base terrified?

Chiarelli: yes but they are
in the military after all

Raddatz: OMG Tom Brady like soft balls!

Brennan: they should bring the
hammer down and suspend
Tom Brady for two games

Raddatz: wow

Brennan: the NFL is not pleased

Palmer: they are repeat offenders
so they will get a hefty fine

Raddatz: oh my

Palmer: the NFL should not hand
out fines without concrete evidence

Raddatz: there's heaps of concrete evidence

Palmer: true - but manipulation
of balls is very common in the NFL

Raddatz: I see

Palmer: all NFL players with their own balls

Raddatz: thanks for coming

Raddatz: OMG is martial law
coming to Texas??

Raddatz: panel sum up the week for me

Ifill: the GOP is so diverse -
running for Republican nomination
we have a woman, a Latino, an
African-American and several morons

Lowry: Democrats are money-grubbing!

Van Susteren: there could
be cholera in Nepal!

Bouie: the economy is finally doing well!

Raddatz: thanks for coming!


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